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Post by Checkmate! on Jan 18, 2006 1:36:54 GMT 8
Hi guys, I just want to know your opinions and ideas about this situation. What if you have a girlfriend,and you two were engaged. You love each other so much. You live in other country(i.e. US) and your GF in other country (Philippines example). You've been together for years and you are a resident of US now. You talked about the future and she told you that she doesn't want to go and stay in US where you are. Her dreams are in the country where she is, have home, stable career, etc. You dont like it though, coz you're goin to be apart, or maybe lose each other. Guys, what are you goin to do if you're the guy? What decision will you make? Go with her and stay(give up everything, also there's the idea your parents will get mad bec of what you did), or call it quit to make her dreams/your dreams come true eventhough you will lose each other. Just wanna know, thanks!! Eto opinion ko. Pansinin mo yung phrase na na banggit mo "you love each other so much". So much ba na willing ang isa mag sacrifice? sacrifice iwan yung career, pamilya para sa mahal niya? Kung Oo naman ang sagot diyan syempre susuond naman na papaandarin e utak. Utak meaning yung pagiging praktikal ba. Yun bang kikitain niyo sa pinas e kasya na pang start ng pamilya? Sino ba mas stable ang career sa inyong 2? sino mas malaki ang sweldo? siya ba o ikaw? kung siya naman e handa ba sa buhay na ganun? last but not the least. Kung hindi kayo mag work out...MARAMI PANG IBA DITO. maniwala ka pre. ganyan din ako bago umalis ng pinas. |
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Post by Checkmate! on Jan 18, 2006 1:39:01 GMT 8
here's my very elementary advice: get a piece of paper, fold it in two, then write down the pros and cons. sometimes, just sometimes, you can have a better picture when you write it down. hope this helps  parang...Kramer Vs Kramer yan a. ;D |
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Post by vic01 on Jan 18, 2006 4:01:35 GMT 8
All i think about is the future, for the family for a better future. That's why I want her to be here, to be wit me exactly. I want my family a good life. You are all right, we have to be smart and practical nowadays. Its not only love, I mean its really good to feel to fall in love but we have to balance everything. We are humans.
I've been doing the best I can just to save our relationship. We've come this far that even people will amazed on what happened on us. But people change. I even said to her, I will apply for my US citizenship and then I will go back there to be w/ her if she doesn't want to come here. Coz, if you are a US citizen, you can live abroad and work, its just that you have to work on it. So we dont lose something on it, on her part and on my part. But she didn't like it too. I cannot understand her now. All she wanted is for me to stay there with her. I dont want to say its gonna be hard to live there bec many people there are very successful. Right now, I still dont know what to do, im just giving time for ourselves. All I do is pray and ask God for guidance. Its one of the best thing we can do to make things alright.
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Post by r2d2t2 on Jan 19, 2006 12:28:28 GMT 8
here's my very elementary advice: get a piece of paper, fold it in two, then write down the pros and cons. sometimes, just sometimes, you can have a better picture when you write it down. hope this helps parang...Kramer Vs Kramer yan a. ;D i didn't know that. oh well, it works for me kc... and it might work for vic01 too. |
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Post by genocide on Jan 20, 2006 1:21:44 GMT 8
maybe this long distance relationship thingy will test the two of you?? i mean, if you really trust each other, you guys can definitely make it work! pero indi mo maiiwasan maparanoid... my dad is a seaman and my parents never had any problems... and my dad (nung mag-syota plang sila ni mami) had to stay for 2 years in abroad and save money before they get married and have kids... maybe you can do the same... hope and trust is all you need...
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Post by vic01 on Jan 20, 2006 4:58:46 GMT 8
Trust is what we need to make the relationship works, no matter how far. If there is no love, there is no trust. And if there is no trust, there is no love.
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Adelaine
DX Gashapon Super Robot
Hayabusa no Ban Kai
Posts: 166
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Post by Adelaine on Jan 22, 2006 16:45:48 GMT 8
0_o. Funky, but my b/f and I were talking about this exact kind of what-if just a few days ago... it's an issue that strikes close to heart, since I myself am seriously aiming to go abroad in a few years.
Like sir UJ already said (long time no see, sir UJ ;D), someone or something really has got to give.
That's also part of the Hayabusa's take on the matter. But personally, I disagree with him. Maybe I'm the only one who thinks this, but I feel that if my commitment to my partner is solid, then being apart is not a test but rather a temporary state of being. If you don't "love" your partner enough to be able to say that, then that's the only time you start to become plagued with doubts you can't answer.
Underneath it all, there is only one simple question to ask: What is more important to you? If no one is willing to compromise, then isn't that the same as saying you both are putting career over being together?
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Post by vic01 on Jan 22, 2006 17:31:38 GMT 8
Underneath it all, there is only one simple question to ask: What is more important to you? If no one is willing to compromise, then isn't that the same as saying you both are putting career over being together? That's true. |
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Post by vic01 on Feb 1, 2006 19:35:55 GMT 8
Decision is to be with her... I won't regret it. I love her more than my life. This is it.
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Post by V2 on Feb 1, 2006 20:00:42 GMT 8
yaaay! then come back fast!
(and dont forget your GFFs!!!)
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Post by vic01 on Feb 1, 2006 22:48:43 GMT 8
yaaay! then come back fast! (and dont forget your GFFs!!!)Haha! Cge dude! Nwayz, she just recently emailed me that she doesnt want to be w/ me anymore. And she didn't know that I made up my mind to come back and stay w/ her. So I emailed it. Now, she didnt reply anymore. All I have to do is kick my butt to go back. Plus I have to tell seriously to my parents... Whatever, im set. |
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Post by V2 on Feb 1, 2006 23:00:38 GMT 8
tsk tsk... looks like she found a "replacement unit that's near to her locally...
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Post by genocide on Feb 2, 2006 6:57:54 GMT 8
yaaay! then come back fast! (and dont forget your GFFs!!!)Haha! Cge dude! Nwayz, she just recently emailed me that she doesnt want to be w/ me anymore. And she didn't know that I made up my mind to come back and stay w/ her. So I emailed it. Now, she didnt reply anymore. All I have to do is kick my butt to go back. Plus I have to tell seriously to my parents... Whatever, im set. i think she just said that as a defense mechanism??? cguro chik-boy ka kya she lost all her hopes??? hahaha just kidding bro!!!! if you come back here, have a safe trip dude.... and goodluck!!! |
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Post by vic01 on Feb 2, 2006 15:57:11 GMT 8
tsk tsk... looks like she found a "replacement unit that's near to her locally... Yes you can say that! It is, hehe. |
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Post by vic01 on Feb 2, 2006 16:00:38 GMT 8
Haha! Cge dude! Nwayz, she just recently emailed me that she doesnt want to be w/ me anymore. And she didn't know that I made up my mind to come back and stay w/ her. So I emailed it. Now, she didnt reply anymore. All I have to do is kick my butt to go back. Plus I have to tell seriously to my parents... Whatever, im set. i think she just said that as a defense mechanism??? cguro chik-boy ka kya she lost all her hopes??? hahaha just kidding bro!!!! if you come back here, have a safe trip dude.... and goodluck!!! I was thinking it also that its just a defense mechanism, you know. People have pride and its natural. Thanks, I will.  |
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keeping the site active as a place to dump info for easier backtracking.